Saturday, August 16, 2008

The NEXT generation Model

"The price we pay for advance in civilisation is loss of happiness"- wrote Sigmund Freud. Of course he wrote many more interesting things regarding promiscuous topics, but this statement reinforces his high-handedness.
Does this mean pleasure and progress don't go together??? It seems absurd considering that we've all reaped the benefits of technology which has generally upped the quality of our lives. A wheel made things easier, agriculture alienated foraging, antibiotics alleviated suffering, electronics has revolutionised the communication industry. So, how can such palpable gains result in loss of happiness???

Actually, Freud talks about a totally different kind of happiness which is often miscontrued the same way as his other pennings are. This unhappiness is a by-product of technological and societal advancement which results in unreasonable and often nefarious demands which is unmatched by the supply. Hence, the discontent and consequently the evident unhappiness in the lives of people all around.

What has happened from the time Freud made his observation is that happiness is also considered as an 'offer', though it is an ephemeral one. This perception has resulted in a subtle shift in people's attitude according to which happiness ultimately boils down to an Insignia, an iPhone, a charming girlfriend, a date with Katrina Kaif or a Botox treatement. Unfortunately, Buddha had realised and propogated years ago that the next model is always out of stock in the present. Hence, one's happiness on the basis of his possession or prowess is bound to be overwhelmed in future. Thus, perennial unavailability leads to disenchantment which breeds discontenment and as they say- Only DESIRE remains.... I cannot fathom an unhappier situation.

Aamir Khan casts a spell with this latest Samsung brand flick - Next is What??? I think i may answer this ubiqutous question. NEXT is infact HAPPINESS. It just needs a subtle introspection and identification of priorities.
Service to parents may top the list of priorities. You might start realising the difference in contentment level between owning an Audi and washing dishes/clothes as a gesture of help for your 'Mom'.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Leaders - Dormant or Extinct ????

For me there are only two LEADERS : People who have led their organisation on the basis of their overarching vision or have directed the whole Indian simulacrum with their staunch effectuation.

Azim Premji and Mahatma Gandhi delineate these definitions of leaders who have redefined evolution and led by example. Leadership is one dicey quality which is not everyone's cup of tea but those who exhibit leadership skills are primarily those who reflect utmost clarity in their goals and objectives. Our country, unfortunately, cannot boast of leaders who have the ability to alter the prevalent dictates. Leadership is percieved to be overtly linked to the short-term dynamic linkages and this explains ten captains in any cricket team within our country. Morover, obeyance is probably miscontrued with servility and THIS spells doomsday to any voluntary team strucutre. Hence, when the mass attaches zilch importance to leaders appending the denigrating power equations riding various organisation/national strucutres, LEADERS are individuals who have, as i said earlier redefined 'evolution' of thought and generated 'value' for the whole/part of the nation.

Now that i get to see Mr. Premji at close quarters at Sarjapur HO, I yearn for an opportunity to have a quick chat with him some time. Maybe a few blanket statement subversive of his stance on the various loopholes along with some customised advicing would be icing on the cake. According to me, he falls under the Visionary category for having foreseen the business value of IT during times it was unheard of. The diversification in Wipro's business with IT being a major driver typifies the evolution to a vegetable oil company to an diversified major. Now that he has stressed on the importance of consulting in the coming years, I feel that i may be in the right place just at the right time (I digressed from a general thought process to a personalised conviction, of course all MEN are selfish !!!!).

I think the words in the brackets indicate my fickle mindset which does not remain focussed for a decent interval. Morover the comment about all men being selfish is totally out of context but i decided to go ahead with writing it as it would appeal to the few enshrouded readers of the pink fraternity (There must be an element for everybody in this piece).

Moving on and coming back to square one, i would end putting down words of extolment for Bapu as it is the fruits of his efforts, that we are relishing today (especially me in this wonderful Bangalore where everything seems to be in abundance EXCEPT sunlight). The father of the nation is certainly one who showcased unassailable leadership to drive the whole nation with simple yet effective dictates. He is the Leader of the Masses according to me, I cannot think of anybody else though.

How about me as a leader.....???? I need to figure out my brand positioning before i give any further thought in this regard. Kudos

Friday, July 25, 2008

Everything seems settled except that i feel like writing pale english

I know squarely that nobody reads my blogs... its transforming towards being a personal diary. The country needs to sustain its vigour and confidence at this moment and instill faith in the propinquty of the entire spectrum. Dark Knight is a phenomenal potrayal of the abstractions governing a mob psychology and the effective gadgets. Batman and Joker seems to the most realistic depiction of those non-supernatural combats.

How can i resist you?? How can i insist you?? How can i assist you???

Blogs and Widgets

Sometimes you try and attach a purpose and meaning to everything you do........ but there are occasions where you try and enact an entirely non-value add. However, deep within your innate self, you wish that these actions bear the most unexpected and encouraging fruits for yourself.

I am pretty confused person these days. One who is clear only about his professional work and caught in a quagmire when it comes to everything else. Definitely fate has its own ways of squaring things up..... but the way i'm being carried on two foot is something i am unanswerable towards. Be it CAT, Economic times, household responsibilities or any other event which i experience outside the Sarjapur Campus, everything seems to reflect the divine backing. This is because i find things happening at their own behest without my sincere efforts which i percieve are pivotal. Perhaps, i may be enjoying the stage in my life when everything is spoon-fed by the supernatural.
I may not be able to emulate two totalitasian personalities but i guess there is lot to be learnt in terms an eye for detail, the rightful brashness, the eye for analysis, the overwhelming assertiveness, the sense of humour, the indecisive aura. It is my strong feeling that a man evolves with his work and the access to various databases personify the beginning of an analytical evolution.

I have another weekend at my disposal to take memories which will help me the stabilise during the marooned moments next week. Its high time i start envisoning a long-term objective for myself. There are too many short-term goals which seems to play on each other's shoulders without really making it to the brain.

Love is in the air....... infact, it is only in the air and NONE inside -- Unknown
If i get three hours to cut a tree i will spend two hours sharpening my axe -- Abraham Lincoln
Uplifting yourself is sucess but uplifting others is significanct success.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Reviving .... Rejuvenating....MY Pristine Self !!!


Sometimes words are hard to find... especially when brevity, clarity are the dictates and wordiness, pomposity and cliches are not permitted. I think such a strictured environment brings the most able writer out an individual. Something which would show a FOG Index of 12-13, but would convey the intention in the best possible explanantion needing no annotations. I must say that a being a writer is one of the toughest accomplishments of life. It is something which if further enunciate when a person like Vasudev Murthy brands himself as a 'failed writer'.

The Global Research Center for Consulting (GRCC) has been framed and now forumulations regarding its Process Framework are on its way. The standardisation achieved with respect to the documents is simply amazing. Imagine a 'signature' ,which is of the most personal and innate nature, being standardised. Actually the stay over here makes me appreciate the higher thoughts or abstraction namely business value, business diagnosis, strategy and standardisation.

'Consulting' as a career sound appealing and in order to inculcate the expected qualities of an conman who constantly insults (con-sultant), i cannot help feeling that i may have made the best START. The levels of interaction I have had so farand the extent of confidence demonstrated on me as an Consultant have been phenomenal.

The only bone of contention is MBA>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> I feel i should go to a Consulting BSchool rather than a general BSchool.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Happy Birthday Dude... Have a blast !!!!

Happy Birthday dude.... Have a blast.
Probably the sole one liner which i trance forward as birthday wishes to one and all. So, the locution needs to common to both thy neighbour and thyselves.

Probably this approaching birthday made me wonder,why and how on earth does this day create so much excitement among the recipients???? a trait commonly or infact outrightly, observed in all of the anthropological genres (girls majorly) i have befriended. Is this really the day when you seat yourselves at the throne of felicity and expect others to pamper you, shower yourself with goodies and wishes alike??? Is this day deservant of the pompousness and grandiloquence which you ascribe it to???? Is this the only justified occasion to corroborate that you are indeed one special creation????

I must admit that i have been no exception to these flavouring when i was young. The start of December used to elevate me to the pinnacle of a virtual Happy Mountain which then chute with exponential speed as soon as the day was over. Being the shortest day of the year (22nd December) made only matters worse for me. I reminisce with acute nostalgia the days when my friends in colony used to come over during the party, and i stationed myself at the entrance of my house allowing only those with a gift. And then as i evolved/matured, (a polite way of saying that i degraded) i used to treat my friends in school in a disc/pub where everyone lost his senses as we only went to Oxygen or Delhi Devils (liquor free). (I am still deprived of the wonderful blessing on manking as concieved by smokers and alcoholics). However, contentment and propitiation are two distant attributes which i have always aimed to accomplish, but, they always seemed a further mile away with every passing birthday.

Last year, i had the blessed opportunity to spend my first birthday at college. I call the opportunity blessed not because i had my coterie around, but because i could use the day towards some authentically genuine service, which i guess, everyone is expected to undertake on days which are special to him. Its been quite a few years since i have been donation flour to the blind school near my house during the birthdays of people special in my life. However, last year after my major examination, i sped to Madhav orphange in Gwalior where i distributed apples and oranges to the kids. It was then that the feeling of contentment ebbed to the brim. Those smiles, those verbalisms, those countenance and those gratitudes enlightened me beyond expressions, beyond descriptions. Since i had a party planned back in coll, i had rush back and i was very repentant that i was compromising the real celebration for a societal celebration which neither redeems nor restores any unfeigned archetypes.

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I must realise that this year is a benchmark, one which marks a transition from an average college kid to an untested corporate resource. I have some very important goals for the future and i must pledge to pursue them with all sincerity and dedication. I must pay due cognisance to the fact that there will be distractions galore, both warranted and unwarranted. However, i must pervade through them with undeterred motivation. Also i must do away with the rashness which has been my perennial doom speller in the past. Just another moment of silence will help me silence the sceptical negativism.

Cheers to yet another completion of a successful year. May you march with austerity towards being a subservient force for your parents and an assertive force for the posterity.

Sunday, December 02, 2007

Turbulating Conundrum

Am in a majestic fix of vibrant sorts....

Committed the worst blunder of my life on Nov 18, but what set ME apart was that I was actually able to pull myself out of the gloom very early, to my surprise. Many would disagree, but the preparation certainly instilled within me an ATTITUDE. The one that i always lacked. I always seemed to cog my mind with those nebulous thoughts of negativities. I must admit that i am very lucky to be actually what i have positioned myself at Present, as. I have strong reservations about my Intelligent and emotional quotients. Though, trough of failure have been cyclical, they have been ephemeral . But i always seemed to brood over those, disturb myself to the heck and always felt like running towards oblivion. What set me apart this time around and hopefully would , in future, is the pace at which i pulled out myself from the web- the ever inciting web of gloom, misfortune, insecurity and forged thoughts.

The insouciance is nothing but serendipity but I enjoyed it to the hilt. It added a certain flavour to my outlook of looking at Nature for a second and forgetting/forgiving ALL. Though i must confess that the traits of a human do not allow me to sustain my nonchalance for long, and the peers (both internal and external) play their derogatory roles, I have begun to realise that the key to calmness and success lies in speedy extrication from the excoriating events.
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What if?????????????

You are a part of a menage where every alternate generations have mute and dumb childeren. Constrasting this misfortune is perhaps the fact that the girls in the lineage are excessively gorgeous, but alas no one prefers to marry them as the children born to them are definintive to be dumb and mute, or atleast.... have been so... for many generations.
A dumb and mute grandma/ grandpa, hale and hearty (not sure!!!) mom and dad, and once again the dumb and mute children. The conversation in their house was through various signals made using the face and the hands.

If you saw that for once, would you ever dare to bother others with your thrawting frustrations.
Not much to be written but certainly more to the mind.
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Selfless service to primarily one's parents and then the society are the key dictates towards sure shot happiness. However, the word "selfless" is the pons asinorum when it comes to an ambitioius mix of pride, arrogance and materialism like me. However, i just sincerely hope that I am able to support my parents without getting into this unwanted race of unending material conquest. Am happy with th realisation, but sustaining and reminding myself of the sole reason of my toils would be my test.

Wish i were able to share with you .... all my propitious incidents and turbulations alike.
But somewhere down the aisle... get tired of the hypocricies i dislike.

I lift myself all over again.... striving to rejuvenate myself to my pristing self.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Resuscitating Clairvoyance

Life has been a ‘penance’ …. Of late..!!!!!!
Strict adherence to timings with occasional discrepancies has been the hallmark of the past fortnight. Also the four point programme – something similar to the common minimum programme of the UPA, the only difference being the accentuation of the walk rather than the talk. But, somehow the one doing with @#%$ seems elusive. I feel that if I improve upon this aspect, it will be nothing but a cakewalk on frictionless lanceolate promontory.

Got the taste of my first ninety around percentiles and 200 odd ranks, in the past week. In no way do I feel confident or assured of similar performances in the future, though it is only improving. I have always believed that one needs to peak at the right opportune time, the propitious time when nothing can stall your ascent. Also the fact that the peak is best when closest to the end rather than a period interspersing the final days and initial hours. Overconfidence is something which comes to me naturally even if I achieve the smallest of achievements. But this time I am pretty conscious and cognizant of my approach towards the goal. There is only a diaphanous veneer which bifurcates the egotism with pragmatism.

Praying for all that my Mom wanted me to… Strange that I give in my spiritual quotient on the blog world. Actually it keeps me posted of my authentic prayers and the ones inciting greed, impatience etc etc.

“The way she makes me feel………………..
She is both my sTreNgtH and Achilles heel”

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Great news !!! Mummy, Daddy, Sathyan........etc etc

Finally got placed… One seems to wait with an indefinite impatience for this day of one’s life @ college \ institute. I have this surge of conviction flowing through my stratums all over again. Contrary to this, the feeling sank in no time, the result did come sweet but it was not without its share of blemishes. I just could not get a hang of how things were cropping in the period interspersing my first round and HR interview. I did get the HR thinking though !!!!! All the drums of African safari about ethics being an imperative part of their core value proposition seemed to fall like nine pins when she replied to my skepticism.

However, all said and done, I was very happy to find my relatives relishing the news of the still very plump and young Sanjeev (in their memories) casting his first step as a neophyte into the world of corporatism. The second thing which put me off was the ITC imbroglio and I felt that I needed to undertake a seminal effort in helping my mates getting placed. Satyam did make things easier to an extent, but still, with some guys remaining, celebration continues to deceive.

Now, I should start preparing myself for the artistic test of giving the mocks as it is not only subject expertise which counts. Not much to write for now, but definitely sullen times and gloomy disguises need to put to the shore, and lots of learning , pondering and strategizing needs to be done.

Cheers………………

Thursday, July 19, 2007

BeToKeNeD__bILLetS

Long time… No see…..

Just to explicate in brief….
I have been undergoing my summer Internship at Pre-Sales Team, Documentum, ECM 1 Practice, Satyam Computer Services Limited, Chennai.

I have been very conspicuous of my absence in office. I am kind of welcomed with sardonic smiles every single time I move over to my seat besides Harsh sir and Vipul sir. The Pre Sales team is the only riddance when it comes to an invigorating work place. The remnants within the campus have that lackluster guise which can get onto one’s patience. However, in whatever minimal time I swank spent in office, it has been a mixed breed of tenacious works and buoyant breaks. However, I think I have assimilated enough to impose a swank bio-data. The training in Documentum and the Proof of Concept aligning the needs of the Publishing Domain with the Marklogic Content Server seem to be the only value addition. The analysis and design of the Reusable Templates have been derisory. Nonetheless, they find a place in my CV as I believe that I can mildew or mask the unadulterated work to an appreciable level of granularity.
Its only final presentation that beckons and I find myself folding the pages of my internship.

A few days later……………..

However, these three months have been more of a period of austerity. I have been closely observing the key tenets of professional life. In the end after feeling my completion certificate, I retort with all the abuses I know….. all the Hindi ones (been long since I used one), all the Tamil ones and the English ones came flowing too…. Following suit

Am not being complacent, but it is an innate disposition NOW, that I stand a good chance to perform but then, what about the perforce scratch your back strategists??? Darwin should try and reassess his theory. In the world of IT, it’s the one who is the best when it comes to scratching, who survives, certainly not the FiTtesT.

Now describing the parallel world of coquettes…..

Saw her only to believe that ……… at first sight is a certainty. I have been associated with all types of gimcracks, but its ironical how the shock of my life came in this desert city of Chennai (don’t see pink much… except on Hutch billboards). No !!!!!! I am sure it’s not a mirage.

Still have that air on sanctity surrounding me and will bookmark that moment as one of the few sacrosanct ones. Fingers tremble as I type these words as I am well aware that there may never be such a moment in my life, ever again.

“How can I resist you when I feel SO close to my heart”

Anyways, I come back to my world of stark veracity. Have never been so weak to give myself away and that too on a public domain, but ALAS….I Have not been able to rant for long. Next in the cavalcade is the TCS enigma and finally the mother of all… the common aptitude test. Don’t want to give away this time around as I have always done in entrance examinations in the past. But the failures of the past do continue to haunt me.
As for the internship is concerned, I feel my decision to quit Fuhzen and stay back in the country has been one of my best EveR. Today I feel I am more richer, than what I could have been had I accepted that $1600 covenant.

Even if I am to map it with the tangibility of dollars, a 1000$ training in Documentum, all for free, courtesy Satyam has been the announcement. Add to this, the priceless stay @ HOME with mom and Anirudh is luxury personified. The visit we paid to the numerous relatives during the past two months have supercharged my social habituation. Today I palpate myself only to find myself devoid of the various negativities which one inculcates when, away from home.

Karnataka, AP, Kerala, Sri Lanka, Cambodia have all been great…!!!
I am feeling the cutaneous senses ….. surpassing even the price-less moments which Master Card propagates.

God Bless One and All (Conclusions voiced by my rejuvenated spiritual quotient.)

Friday, October 27, 2006

What cannot be cured must be endured

Find myself afflicted on several counts...... its always that i write these grieving verses.... the grappling health problems have been toxic to say the least.
Delhi is battling with dengue, chickungunya and several viruses which haven't been nomenclatured yet, and when i got sick at home, i was made to shudder several ounces of blood, and all the test were negative, thankfully. Then what is the 'pons asinorum '????? I used a really heavy word there...... the meaning makes an interesting reading and comprehension..... sounds Latin to me if the origin is concerned.

Coming back, its a disconsolate remark that the college here had has reached its plateau and on its way towards the downward decline..... if the Gartner Hype Cycles are consulted for an effective judgement on the same !!!!
There is this girl who drives me crazy every now and then, all my earnest efforts in vain---- and i find myself penning down something which has been way too personal for the past seven years, perhaps thats the magnitude of affliciton and hence the visible dereliction.
And my poise and nonchalance have been tested of late..... the doc has made me wary of several aspects, I sense a repercussion very soon!!! Whatever???
I derive solace form the line "What cannot be cured must be endured" - the propagandas, diatribes (learnt this word in CL), the insinuations, the maskings and the coyness. I fail to define my role at this juncture in college, something which i had been very confident about in the past. Its this indecision which leaves me in obstinate conundrum and i am taking time off, time off from every surrounding event...... giving myself the relevant required time.
The pit falls have been experienced very early, some have been self-dug..... but i plan to pipeline my renewed vigour over these cognitives.

Enjoying a wretched MBA out here---- and how can one keep himself perenially motivated??? and that too for a period of five years.....
Happy Belated Diwali to one and all !!!!!

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Whats the point ????

What the fu***ng point???? I seem to enquire myself on every deed of mine.

A lot seems to have transgressed in the past….. but the walk down the power corridor has finally reaped….. though for a very small stretch, I finally brand myself as one who has been through the thick and thin of the most toxic situation ever in my life.

I sought support sometimes, sometimes I sought isolation--- but I seemed to acquire none. Indeed life had tested me with a very serious hair pin bend, whats more the spirituality quotient seemed to quiver and I was left with mammoth frustrations and bare minimum incisions. What I carry outside the bend is immunity towards snares.

The minors have lost their relevance in my dictionary. My admiration list seems to have a surprise entry in DP, never expected this guy to rise….. his intricate disposition is still a reservation for me… but the way he has networked himself is commendable. I pity the ones who reveal their jealousy in blasphemous ways. One should try and renovate one’s own USP rather than tampering others……. That’s where people seem to lag behind in the race.

Career Laucher has given me direction towards an elusive target, hope to continue and make the best out of the deal. The nitty-gritty’s have been given the first gear which I seem to cross right at the onset these days. The ego, the anger, the sloth, the lust, the jealousy, the greed, the ……. naaaaaaaaaaaahhHHHH !!!!

Its high time I exert myself and retrieve the hidden challenges in my management domain, these two years seem to be crucial and I do not want to repent two years down the line. i need to realise that there is nothing left to prove any more, there is lots left to achieve and only achieve....... i do not need to act in order to cast an impression, incite an admiration or articulate an appreciation, its high time i start working towards being at the other side of my contemplations.
The nascent years of an emerging powerhouse have seemed to commence

chao and cheers to renewed vigour.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

The power of SILENCE.....

Silence is golden, perhaps much more than that……

The only problem I have in being silent is that I haven’t been bestowed with an intricate disposition towards being silent. But in the recent past, I tend to ‘brood’ with a sullen guise, the ‘guise’ which sometimes makes me seem synonymous to Hitler brooding over the Alps and hence the usage.

My room serves as the lounge for my ruminations, high up in the third floor overlooking the scenic table mountains of Gwalior, the day is not far when I’ll brood standing over the mountain and the intensity then is going to be much more passionate.
Silence propels towards a second opening, the one which has the element of the wittiness, the drollness, the maturity which is so seriously sought in this world of scratch-your-back strategists. What is essentially required along is patience, which casts of unwanted stimulations and fidgety. The expectation contest has gone overboard now, even the strongest of conveyances could not suffice, the best possible way out of it is ‘silence’ over everything, every time, everywhere.

Not much days left towards the end of my walk (down the power corridor), it really shook up the debauched, and will shake many more to come. Life is all about setting targets and I seem to be moving ahead in this regard with oozing confidence. The spirituality quotient is in doldrums for the first time in the last two years, never had a break this long although it’s only a few days if recounted on paper. The intimates who seem to typecast my gloom need to be cajoled, but I am just not in the right rhythm in this regard, am waiting for my walk to produce the real ‘fruit’.

READ Icon by Fredrick Forsyth, another tussle between the CIA and the KGB, how the author managed to potray KGB in such poor light remains a quandary only which he can throw light upon. But all in all, a wonderful novel about how a Russian leader shielded his fascist beliefs behind his liberal worlds of glory of the motherland and renunciation of unwanted power. And the systematic and logical training methodology of the british intelligence received its fair share of admiration. Got a good insight about the intricacies involved in crucial intelligence operations. Really fear going to Moscow now…. !!!!!

The Raid at Entebbe and Munich exemplifying the Israeli courage forced me to contrast them with Jaswant Singh’s “Call of honour”.

To be or not to be……………….. chao

Monday, July 17, 2006

Hona hain tujhme ... FANNA........

Hmm… it’s a superlative fight within, I must say I cannot cater to the qualms of all but certainly my closet deserves a better treatment, however, how does one justify the ever competitive, ever grudge inducing, ever propelling perceptions????

Brand me as an ambassador one day, as a pauper the next…. !!!!!
Whatever you do, I’ll be by your side, you wish otherwise …. Lest.

The world seems to ask me about my walk through the power corridor, this inquisitive seems disturbing to me at times … !!! Won’t like to give myself away on any pretext, though its compelling within. But definitely, the more you try to stay surreptitious, the more drawn out becomes your identity.
Some presumptuous movement is definitely there, but again the whopping obstacle stays affirm, I’ve to act out of my wits, cannot let the canard carry on , can I???

PL and MnS assignments seem to hog the notoriety for me these days, do not want to internal motivation and wish to adhere to the deadlines….. WISH !!!! its nostalgic to resurface contact with my old conjoins--- Charu, Juhi, Rachita, Robin, Bharat, Gaurav, Chetali, Pankaj …………. I miss those utterances which had the blend of maturity and vivaciousness to them. Those interactions have really taken me this far avoiding the recalcitrant state of affairs (which could have been surreal addition to my woes).

Waiting for the day when I can pen down my arrogance without any blemish.
chao

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Envy vs Jealousy

Its been quite some time since I find myself mellowed down … with varying magnitudes at an assortment of junctures, the rationale being my quest to understand the intricacies of the human edge.
The various pedigrees seem to justify their recital and strokes, they play their roles in the skirmish with varying impetus. The cause for unision seems to be more out of jealousy than envy…. since jealousy will propel u to try and scratch the other’s back rather than straightening yours. Envy seems to arouse a healthy competition which fabricates one’s paramount features.

My walk through the power corridoor seems to make me arrogant to the core …(nice rhyme) , I must confess to it even though I have no rhyme or reason…. no capability either, but it’s a stimulating dispute within. Things seem to ease out exponentially when I have a retort to offer to my beloved anonymous, and that too a brute one… and there is no respite in this regard. I am Really thankful to the man who has instilled so many qualities within me ….. had I been party to these kind of pressure tactics right from infancy, it would have been a different ball game by now.


Pretty sad that Shrivastava sir is being made to leave this institute in such circumstances, wish everything falls back in place for him …. as he wished for !!!! I consider it an honour that he remembered me and dispensed those words for me….. they stand to encourage me for a long time from now.
But these bastards are hell bent on screwing up this place, have witnessed some unforgettable episodes of late… they have been very toxic!!!!
I have learnt to swim against the tide though not with proficiency, but this marks a new beginning within me, a benign one. And I have started admiring people around for the wealth of genius they seem to conceal within their skin, and in the same monotonous tone have I started to despise the fictitious glances which never appear to flee my vision.

And i could sense your affection when i ate the mangoes........... mummy !!!

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Passing days

"Family is more important than the state"------
"The one who is most envied is the one who has no envy"-----

Quite contrasting statements, but have a profound impact on me these days...... Manish told me about Ain Rand's Fountainhead... i have to read this novel someday..... its as if some kind of an insufflate has been subjected over me.
Well, an act of insolence was rectified by me ..... and finally the far-fetching finance was kicked out of the stadium by me and my mate...........
n WORLD CUP 2006.... WOW!!!!!! i'll brand myself as an ardent fan of Czech Republic.....
Milan Baros and Jan Koller take the startup..... the towering Koller supporting Baros and a deadly combo in the offing.Stupendous play makers in the form of Nedved, Poborsky and Rosicky(his double strike will arouse a sense of excitement within each Liverpool fan.... But they might be praying that he unwinds his magic not against England). The defence is certainly a thing to ponder about.... but its not all that contrite either.

The BTech project seems to treading the right path.... its now time for implementation of the algos on any sector.... and coming out with a business decision will be the real test. Am in a fix wether the health sector or retail sector will be the better proposition. The papers on telecommunication seems to have had an auspicious beginning .... lets check out ..... what Dhruv does with insurance.
Am excited about meeting Anirudh (my nephew) when he comes over to delhi in a short while.... a snobbish boy barely 4 months old.... but already smiling and crying in pipelines....GOD bless you Ani

Sunday, June 04, 2006

The Reservation Conundrum

The nation seems to be at its fore when it comes to disapproving the current bill passes by the honourable Parliament of Inida----- the one stating a 27 per cent reservations for the OBC’s in the elite institutions of India(totaling to 49.5 %). Yesterday’s Express stated that many other autonomous and private institutions are also in the net…….. the HRD minister asserting punitive action against the rebels…. not the masses but the administration of the institutions……..
Hence 'this' is being asserted on the institutions and the country….. what an impediment to the vision of Rev. President’s vision of India -2020-------- or REALLY??????

Am forlorn in certain aspects though…….. I’d state that the cabinet ministers are supported by a stream of bright IAS’ and other civil servants…… hence the collective decision and the associated adamancy must have a relevant and strong backing. Its very tranquil on our part to criticize the politicians and their vision….. branding them as fools, corrupt, unethical etc etc….. spare a thought to the development the country is facing under them.

Let me take to some concrete words now, to be admitted to an M.B.A. program, students have to go through a selection process, which includes entrance/admission tests, a group discussion and an interview if the candidate is successful in the written test. The aim of the test is to evaluate, under stress, a candidate's general verbal, mathematical and analytical abilities. Passing the management entrance test in India will require a superior command of the English language, quantities skills and a sharp mind.

NOW read this…… how on earth are you going to visualize the bright students of the nation hailing from less privileged societies and less known colleges/universities — Uttar Pradesh (U.P.), Bihar, Uttaranchal, Rajsthan, Jharkhand and Madhya Pradesh (M.P.) (Data Source : Business World… don’t hold my neck if your state figures out in this !!).

The reservation might give them a chance to compete among their parallels…. Right??? English should not be a bottleneck to success….. and why am I saying this?????
Electricity, health, education, transport, urban planning and rural development sectors are mostly mismanaged and this in need of qualified managers….. will an IIM grad opt for this when he has scores of multinationals pusuing him with exponential pay packages. The ostensible talent of our country will be a boon to a foreign enterprise…. but very rarely the public sector of the country……

Imagine a person with the language-brigde but an astute brain, won’t the above mentioned deficient sectors offer him the best opportunities???? Imagine the development he can initiate since he will be well versed with the ethnocentric aspects arising out of a rural background.

These reservation candidates have limitations in their abilities…(sorry if I am insolent !!) but this imperfection augurs perfectly well for the country … and believe me it will a positive step towards INDIA SHINING…. Not the individual shining--- We all owe something to our country…. Don’t we.

P.S.-: Now Now!!!! Arjun singh did not pay me any money to write this…. Nor will I go into the public sector if I were an IIM grad…… but I sincerely believe the govt might have a long term plan for India… a genuine one for me……. Wooing the vote banks remains the prime reason though….. am well aware of those bloody bas*****s.

Saturday, June 03, 2006

The GLAD lad

It was Mother's day and i gifted my mom a Nokia 1100 ... it only costs 2200 bucks....... It was Father's day and i presented to my dad the beautiful red checked tie with radiating cuff-links(have i spelt it right).
Its a miniscule compared to what the future beckons in this regards but...... the reason i am thrilled is because these acts mark the initiation.... a surreal one... no doubt. Morover, these were my achievements and i am honoured to share them with my parents.
The tie and the cuff links were a part vast range of men's accessories i won during the Mr. Aurora contest. It would a contentious feeling if i get to see a photograph of my dad sporting them in one of his official tours.
I managed 1600 bucks out of Infotsav'06, bad luck with Avalon and Brouhaha .... but i could have surely done well with Avalon..... Brouhaha was to the best of my efforts. So i was only a partial sponsor, my big bro took care of the rest..... however, its the feeling which matter... right !!!!

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Quarter-life Crisis

Maybe we all r going through this "Being Twenty-Something".
They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as "confused" as you, often musing the same things about you.
Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't.

One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone, scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.

You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out....... its upto to you.... derive roses out of thorn beds or make rose petals seem synonymous to thorns... chao...

Friday, May 05, 2006

Lonely Extrovert

Can extroverts ever find themselves lonely, morose, trampled and recalcitrant.????????
Well personally non-affirmative .... going by the jargons but then, its these unicorns of parallelisms which petrify me towards an affirmation..... probably got way above ur heads..... usually all my intricate thoughts do the same.

Here I am in abv-iiitm campus still undecided when to go home, still undecided over various issues and the trail of indecision does not seem to leave me because the issues in which i'm decided are not being accepted or appreciated by the indecisive entities....... probably another aircraft of a thought.

Am progressing towards a disparate search of a passion which will help me sustain my existence, if not now, then atleast some years hence. A passion which will bring a zero slope to my graph rather than initiating the negative slope which we all contemplate some time in future.
On the academic front, i could finally rope in a topic of my interest in BTP and am overwhelmed at the support of Prof. Rakesh Shrivastava in this endeavour of mine.
Coming back !! What i fear the most is the "propaganda" of several individuals, the unstinted anger of several " minds", the overflowing distances and many more intangible connivances.
Am tired, weak, crippled and seemingly incompetent in tolerating my grievances...... its a disparate search of the "brave" and the "determined" and the "meticulous" which many of my mates have branded me as ..... in the past.
Will be off to delhi soon,,,,, probably need to do some soul- searching, Maslow would give me a tight slap if i claim to reach the last slab in his pyramid-- self actualization.
Still huge strides to be taken..... but for that you need to be a physical existence which i cease to be at times........ only at times mind you !!!!! This chain of venting out your woes and collecting them needs to be broken ....... somehow or the other.////