Thursday, September 17, 2009

Palimpsest


The title means a manuscript that has been written with the previous text incompletely erased. We all write palimpsests in our minds in forward (or rather) backward looking ways. We do not seem to do away with our past, we are most often anxious as to what future beckons and in the process, we seem to minimize our existentialism in the present.

I used to regret, brood or envy my past and was always of the opinion that I could have achieved much more. It is a different proposition altogether, that I was (in most occasions) the focal point of envy for a lot many others and what amazes me is that each one managed to convince himself/herself that their envy was genuine. The reasons attributed towards such staunch convictions were plausible maws in my overarching speech in life (I meant plausible gaps in my personality). However, when I sit back and try to be envious, my thoughts seem to get caught in an immanent web and I fail to transcend across to look at faults with others. According to me, the entire mankind is sinful, then why do we attribute others as reasons to defend our contemporary sins (read envy in particular)?

Voila!! I now know how to delicately dictate my immanent and transcendent thoughts towards greater glory..... Immanence when down and out.... AND transcendence when elated... because ambitious goals will assuage humility... and propel me towards greater achievements. In the process of realizing and writing these musings, I guess I have overcome the envious vibes to a great extent. But definitely, there is still a long way to go ... before I surmount all the negativity...... and work towards serving mankind is ways that will be rightfully austere; without any disposition for brownie points... :)

I have always wanted to write about her.... my fingers are rearing but my mind has come to a stand-still. Very seldom does it happen that the body concurs but the mind stops......

Aah.. now I remember, that Coorg... thank you buddies.... I am sure all of us had a great time...
As always, Salman Khan rocks... though not many steps to imitate this time around..... neither do I have the college audience nor the critics to downplay upon.......

Love all and hate none.... I am writing this because I am sensing adequate envious vibes from a lot many these days....

4 comments:

sanjay said...

Envy is a girlish trait, gents only have healthy admiration.

It is admirably hard to be P.B. Sanjeev. Don't show your twisted front tooth now, it is so with all people. But, to come in the vicinity of being someone like Sanjay Saini, you just need to be lazy and whine, whereas to near you, a lot more and versatile things are required.

By the way, I couldn't resist to comment after looking at the picture accompanying the post, that our very own Prabhu Deva has turned in to a remarkably close looking duplicate of Mr. Kamala Hasan.

And what is with you and DJ writing about 'her'.
Something with the Bangeluru air.The city seems to have it. I saw the highest number of french kisses there than I have seen anywhere in India :P


About past, present and future, well they are all tense for me. ( God I still have it in me :), You should write this one down hehe)

Sanjeev said...

@Saini.. So my pic enticed you into commenting...Cool... so I will keep them coming... nice to know that you are equating me with a close duplicate of the Tamil Superhero.

About 'her', we write because we do not get to spend time... and ironically both 'hers' are in Mumbai at this point in time.

Amazing last line... don't be surprised if you find me using it any time sooner or later :)

radiohead said...

I am envious .. and have always been ..

Saale .. there's always a HER you wanna write about .. so called STRONG !!

Sanjeev said...

@ Anuj
I wish I could narrate the entire travail to you .... and if I do... I am sure you would allude that I am a strong guy... Atleast all others who know the entire picture do so....